Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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