I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize