Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
the night ended with taco bell and tears
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
