I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
