DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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