piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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