You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
