I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Drunk walkin through police station. America
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
