didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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