508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I believe in your delicious
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
