Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
