I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You were trust falling into bushes
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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