she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
