Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
