Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
