It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
