I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize