I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
