You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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