You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize