Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Umm I'm too high to move.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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