Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize