I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
