Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
