Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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