after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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