The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
