8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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