I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
True but thats because hes a fetus.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
