If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize