how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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