I want to make a zoo with you.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
