do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
porn star boner night. come get it.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
