then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Randomize