when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
