so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Randomize
