he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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