Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
