Non-Jews are for practice
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
porn star boner night. come get it.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
