If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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