My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I have demons in me.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
