Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
