I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
