And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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