Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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