white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
