just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize