why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
