why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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