"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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