ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
